Closure! Isn’t that what we all look for when someone leaves us unexpectedly? Like one moment they’re right there with us, and the next, they are gone. Just like that. When someone just abandons us at the crossroads of life, and we’re left wondering if at least we deserved a plain ‘goodbye’.
We turn – the person is gone.
We keep walking, then look back – still no sign of them.
And yet some part of us keeps hoping – maybe we’ll meet again at another crossroad.
Maybe they just needed to get somewhere at the moment and they’ll join us back along the way.
Biggest delusion! The sweetest lie we all tell to ourselves.
And when that comforting lie begins to fade, we realize that we are alone on this path now and whether it feels good or not, we have no choice but to keep moving forward because ultimately life doesn’t pause for heartbreak.
Although it feels that the entire Universe has fallen upon us and our world has come to an end – it never works that way you know. Whatever happens, we’re expected to go with the flow of life.
But that’s easier said than done.
There are thoughts that keep crawling back in at random times, in quiet moments, in loud crowds. A million questions. Was our relationship nothing more than just a passing affair? Didn’t it make some sense to at least sit and discuss what went wrong? Wasn’t there any possibility of fixing things, of giving ‘us’ a little more time to understand each other? Had it really become that bad to stay together?
How can someone so easily forget why it all began in the first place? Wasn’t it about love? And if it truly was, then how does it simply vanish after sometime? Why just we couldn’t hold on to it until the end?
The least you could have done was say ‘good bye’ with a few consoling words.
Maybe tell me you really loved me truly. Maybe tell me it wasn’t bad with me, it’s just that the circumstances have changed, or maybe ‘you’ have changed, or is it that you are now looking for some shiny piece of gold and I am just not the one.
Say it.
Say something.
Say Anything.
But only the truth…
But then I think, if I was even bold or strong enough to take it? Goodbyes are goodbyes after all.
If you had already decided, if everything between us was ultimately going to fail, how does it matter what happened. How does it matter if it was me… or you… or that shiny piece of gold that caught your eye. You were going to leave anyway.
All that remains in the end are ‘memories’, the beautiful moments that settle deep in our hearts forever, the moments that refuse to fade away, no matter how much time passes. All that remains in the end are the ‘dreams’ deeply rooted in the depths of our subconscious mind that keep reminding our conscious self that we still ache for a piece of our life that’s no longer ours.
The classic cliché “Time heals everything”. I don’t think that’s true. Some scars are deep enough that even time can’t reach and some moments are too precious ever to be forgotten, no matter how fast the wheel of time turns.
The moments we spent together…The laughter we shared… The cries and tears we didn’t have to bear alone.
The air we breathed together…The sunshine that touched both our faces, casting the same golden glow… the rain that soaked us both together… all those seasons we lived through under the same sky… Those belonged to ‘us’ and nothing… nothing can ever take that away. Not even you, not even me.
Those memories – they are the only lasting gift, untouched by time and kept alive by hearts who truly loved. Not by people who change, not by circumstances that fail. Isn’t that the truest fairy tale everyone secretly dreams of living?
What is a FAIRY TALE, actually?
A fairy tale is when two people, no matter how broken they are, are destined to be together in the most perfect way. A fairy tale is about that ethereal connection between two souls that makes everything feel extraordinary in life. It is when two imperfect hearts meet, at the most unexpected place, at the most unexpected time – often when one or both are already struggling with some sort of misery in their life. Yet, those imperfect hearts manage to connect, yet those broken pieces manage to fit together in the most beautiful way, leaving a lasting impression on the minds of others who come to know about their story.
Holding hands through storms, standing against all odds of life, and still finding joy in the simplest moments. A fairy tale is all about cherishing those moments spent together and making them perfect – turning them into something unforgettable.
A fairy tale brings hope, joy, healing, love, sacrifice, and a happy ending. Yes, all fairy tales do end in happily-ever-afters. At least, that’s how it goes in the storybooks we all grew up reading.
Ours, I believe is no less than a fairy tale, with every checkbox marked, every moment lived like a magic, a dream, except for the happily ever after part.
I may not be Cinderella who found her Prince Charming, and lived in a grand castle thereafter, but I did have a mother with her own issues who hardly loved me and I lived a miserable life marked by struggles, stresses, burdens, tears… and hope. Hope that one day, I’d meet someone who could understand me.
I may not be Rapunzel with her long, flowy hair, but I’ve carried long, tangled messes of doubts and fears, trapped in a tower of my own mind that made me feel worthless every moment.
I didn’t wake up with a magic kiss, but there was ‘you’ who truly saw me in my mess and madness and loved me anyway, for all that I was.
If only it hadn’t fallen apart in the end, it might have been the perfect fairy tale. Our fairy tale.
But, even if I didn’t get closure, even if I didn’t have a goodbye, even if I didn’t get happily-ever-after, castles or crowns, I had a magical fairy tale that was real and just beautiful as it was. Not perfect. Not scripted.
Well, maybe love isn’t just always about castles and crowns, or happily-ever-afters written in golden ink. Maybe, sometimes, what matters most is that you actually got to live that story that some people never even get the chance to live, even if it was only for a while. And may be that’s its own kind of fairy tale.
Sometimes I tell myself I need closure… That I deserve an answer, something to make a sense of it all. So, I could finally be at peace and I could shut down my wandering dreams. But then, there are days I think if maybe I’m better of with the way it all ended – with the silence, with the unanswered questions.
With the acceptance of my today’s reality and believing that mine was a fairy tale after all, I get to live in the delusion that he really loved me or that maybe, at some forgotten corner of his life, he still thinks of me. Because what if the truth was uglier than I could bear? What if he told me that he never loved me? What if he told me that I was just a passing moment he never cared about, a chapter he never cared enough to finish?
Sometimes, living in a delusion helps. It hurts less.
And so, even if the Universe never gives me the closure, it’s ok. Maybe the Universe has given me something better – a fairy tale ending that feels more beautiful, more satisfying. A fairy tale that I can rewrite in my heart the way I want to remember it. A fairy tale that feels a little more hopeful. Hope that somewhere, somehow, he still thinks of me. That maybe, in his quiet moments, he too remembers our fairy tale, the way I’m remembering it right now.
And maybe…
That’s enough.
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